well today by my own doing i finalized the end of me and noelle... by telling derek how she felt about him... probably the dumbest thing i have ever done... but hey it was the least selfish thing to do.. i dont know how this is gonna effect me.. but i dont seem to care as much cuz its derek i mean i am still jealous but derek is a good friend and i'm not gonna let this come inbetween us... i dont know what else to say except yeah i'm gonna miss some things... like after school... watching movies... taking her up on her dares... or just trying to prove her wrong... oh and then drawing on graph paper i'm gonna miss that too... life goes on... life has to go on... it might feel like life is over but this has happened before and i'm still around... so it cant be that bad cuz i know i always get past it somehow... just takes time... except this time i dont have the trailor to go up too... so i'm stuck here in ajax having to deal with seeing noelle and derek together... if they get together... either way still hurts and i cant avoid it...

"everynight in my dreams, i see you, i feel you..." - My Heart Will Go On - New Found Glory