casey i agree with you, that soccer game was fun, and it was nice seeing laura again and being civil with her but i knew it wouldn't last, once the fireworks ended i broke down, thats why i went and sat on the hill. i was looking up at the stairs, it reminded me of the days when laura and i would just spend hours looking into the sky, it was so nice back then. but like you said we have to make the best of the situation and just try and have fun. I just have to keep away from things that remind me of her and the great times we had together. when i really think about it was the best time of my life, and i thank her for it, too bad it didn't last. But it was an expirence i for sure will never forget. The negative side of our relationship i will use to learn from. And make sure that there is 100% communication between me and how ever i may be with. Because, i only date if i think i will be with that person for a while. other wise its not fair to myself or to the other person. Brooke asks me all the time why do such nice people always get the bad relationships. but like i said, i dont think my relationship was that bad. Maybe i'm just in a really good mood right now or maybe thats the truth i dont know. For a long time now i have been having really bad mood swings, and i cant seem to control them. Certain things set me off and it always has something to do with laura. She has become a great stress in my life. She used to be the joy of my life, you know shed make the sun shine a bit brighter, make the days alittle bit more warmer, and it seemed it was done just for me and her. now with out her, the days are gray, and cold. i miss her.